Andy Borowitz reports:
No New Social Network Launched Today
SILICON VALLEY (The Borowitz Report) – A shockwave hit Silicon Valley today when, for the first time in five years, the day came and went without the launch of a single new social networking site.
Best line: Borowitz quotes someone in Silicon Valley, “I’m creating a new social network just for people who are creating social networks.”
A teacher once observed a child having trouble zipping up his jacket. She said, “The secret is to put the straight part all the way in, hold it in with one hand while pulling on the tab with the other hand.”
The child asked, “Why is that a secret?”
In this book, “Secrets” means key principles not generally known, not things people don’t want you to know.
The central purpose of this book is to lay out the secrets — key principles — of Word-of-Mouth Marketing, as distinct from all the details of the techniques. There are so many of them now that it would take 1000+ page book that would be instantly obsolete. By concentrating on principles, this book will help you even think about the things that haven’t been invented yet!
As I was writing about consulting with more clients in the form of smaller consultations, rather than mega-projects with giant companies, I remembered the following story:
A farmer was sitting at the side of the road, selling onions. A tourist stopped and asked how much the onions cost.
“A dollar a pound.”
“How many pounds do you have there?” asked the tourist.
“How much for all 20 pounds?”
“Thirty dollars,” said the farmer.
The tourist was surprised. “No, it should be less than $20 because 20 times one dollar should be $20, less a volume discount for taking them all off your hands at the same time.”
“I know that,” the farmer replied. “But if I sell all 20 pounds to you, I have to go home. If I sell them one pound at a time, I’ll get to meet and talk with 19 other interesting people like you.”
I’ve been telling that story for more than 30 years. It always impressed me. Originally, I heard it told about an “Indian.”
Life isn’t all about maximizing efficiency. By offering smaller consultations, I’m sure meeting a lot more interesting people. Who knew that custom sheds, unusual web sites, physician services, emergency management and other products I would never have heard of could be so interesting? What fun!
How’s this for a great product sample? It’s hilarious, but the reason I’m posting it is that it’s a great marketing example of giving out a sample in the hope it goes viral, I’m sure. As you probably know, I’m not a fan of gratuitous virality attempts, but I’m happy to participate in this one because the thing to be passed on is an actual part of the product instead of some video stunt that’s only tangentially associated with the product, just contributing buzz – otherwise known as noise – in non-word-of-mouth marketing circles.
Click on the link below, then click on the catalog (if you’re blocking Flash on websites, enable it for this site). Click on the lower right hand part of the cover of the catalog, and the pages turn, where you can sample pages from the parody catalog. A perfect way to sample, just waiting to go viral.